Friday YouTube Nugget

Two bits of comic relief today:

Thank You, Masked Man by Lenny Bruce

Tracy Morgan, star of NBC's 30 Rock, is interviewed on a local morning news program. He is, shall we say, in good spirits

UPDATE: More Tracy Morgan goodness, this time on WGN-Chicago

Happy Halloween

from the good people at Mainway Novelties:

Your 2007 World Series Champs

Congrats to the Boston Red Sox...the pluckiest band of $143 million payroll players ever assembled. Hoorah...

Friday YouTube Nugget

A little easy-listening country for you this week. Here's an up-and-coming quintet from the North country. Singing "Far Away Eyes", here's the Rolling Stones:

Check out Charlie Watts' face at 1:38....he is simply the greatest

Paul Wellstone

Today, October 25th, marks the third anniversary of one of the most shocking events of my political lifetime - the plane crash and death of Senator Paul Wellstone (D-MN).

Senator Wellstone, as you can see, wasn't your garden variety, blow-dried politician. He was a proud liberal and probably the only member of the Senate with a conscience. I've identified with Sen. Wellstone more than any other politician in my lifetime (save maybe Howard Dean), because he was genuine and passionate about his public service. I had to love that he was a former Political Science professor before he was elected to the Senate out of nowhere in 1990.

Paul Wellstone spent his life fighting for progressive values, social justice and, most importantly, inspiring people like me to be more active and informed on what goes on around us. His values live on in those he inspired, but I'd be remiss if I didn't take a moment today to say thanks, Senator.

More info on Paul Wellstone here and here

Why is this man laughing?

Meet Mr. 25%

Friday YouTube Nugget

For this week's installment, I set the wayback machine to those heady days of the mid-90's and what I believe to be one of the top 5 pop songs written in the last 20 years. The band is Pulp and the song is "Common People":

Who has two thumbs and center Orchestra tickets to Neil Young at Shea's in November?

THIS GUY!!!!

Miracle on Abbott and Southwestern Drive

An update that I am overjoyed to share: Bills TE Kevin Everett Can Stand On His Own

In a scant five weeks, Everett went from the most grim of prognoses by the attending physicians to becoming ambulatory by himself.


Shit like this reinforces my faith in humanity. Those were people, trained and highly skilled, who saved that man's life. Who applied the body-cooling treatment as soon as he was injured that most likely saved his spine and will lead to him being able to walk again. Said treatment was developed, of course, through the Miami Project, a non-profit organization devoting to reversing paralysis and started by a former NFL linebacker who's son was paralyzed in a college football game in 1985. And who, among NFL owners, is the biggest contributor to the Miami Project, who has donated millions to this cause?


Ralph C. Wilson, Jr, owner of the Buffalo Bills


That circle of life is a humdinger, ain't it?

Day 246: United 93 Held Hostage

Okay....this is beyond the realm of ridiculous and lazy. We're entering Captain CuckooBananas territory here. I have, in my possession, the film United 93 for more than 35 weeks now. What kind of pathological behavior am I exhibiting in this sad affair? Am I so lazy that I'm using the excuse that I can't find the nifty little red Netflix envelope to return the movie to explain why I have held this DVD hostage for 8 months? Can no one explain why I just don't call/e-mail/fax/smokescreen a message to Netflix to send me another envelope? Can it be that I've forfeited 8 months and $40 in membership fees to see other, less-depressing titles?

Why haven't the good people at Netflix reached out to me? A simple message saying "Hey friend - you've been hoarding United 93 for an awful long time...what's up?" would suffice. As would "Hello? Are you OK? Did you hit your head on a coffee table, put some tissues on your massive head wound and die bleeding and blind drunk like William Holden?" Nada, nil, zilch from those robber barons at Netflix....I guess as long as the monthly debit fee comes through, they could care less about my well-being. I think they have to share at least some of the blame here.

I think I need professional help. Or a replacement Netflix envelope.

P.S. It was a tremendous film

UPDATE: Writing this post was somewhat cathartic...it released me from whatever psychic block I was having from taking action on this pathetic episode. I called Netflix and spoke to a nice gentleman who is sending me out a bonus DVD (Blades of Glory)....then, I can return both DVDs in the new mailer. Problem solved...until next month.

The Humanist's Eye On Hollywood

DATELINE: Hollywood:

Holy shit....I just read Angie Everhart is engaged to......wait for it.....

Joe Pesci.

Yes, Joe Pesci.

This Joe Pesci:

is engaged to this:

that's right, little Joe Pesci is going to be making animal noises in this woman's ear:

This raises, of course, several questions - does he even come up to her mid-thigh? Why did God/Buddha/Jehovah/Allah/Flying Spaghetti Monster bless Joe Pesci with so many earthly rewards? Why couldn't Toulouse-Lautrec or Sartre pull off something this audacious?

Saturday YouTube Nugget

The exquisite Nina Simone, live from Ronnie Scott's, singing "If You Knew" . I guess the club's air conditioning was on the fritz that night.

Al Gore is My President

And the Nobel Peace Prize goes to....

The Continuing Saga of Senator Widestance

Well, well....our favorite men's-room-cruising senator, Larry Craig has had quite a busy month. After first pledging to resign September 30, good ol' Larry flip-flopped and announced he would stay and fight. Gotta love these Republicans and their "ethics".

Sen. Craig. of course, famously reversed course initially by saying if he was able to convince a judge to withdraw his original guily plea, he wouldn't resign. How did that work out? Eh, not so well.

This mattered not a whit to Sen. Craig...he vowed to complete his current term, which runs through January 2009 (about the time we'll be swearing in a new Democratic president and ushering in significant Democratic majorities in both houses of Congress). I would love the spectre of this closet case in the Senate as a daily reminder to voters in Idaho and elsewhere that the GOP is a party of moral hypocrites, serial lawbreakers, and self-aggrandizing liars.

One more note - it's good to see that certain sectors of Sen. Craig's homestate still stands behind him, firm and strong. Welcome your newest inductee into the Idaho Hall of Fame - Senator Widestance.

It's Johnny's Birthday, it's Johnny's birthday...

Christ, I almost forgot. Happy 67th birthday, John Lennon

Everybody Knows This Is Nowhere

Somewhere in the Guangdong province on the south coast of China, a simple farmer got up this morning to tend to his beet crop, unaware that about the time he was waking up, God was delivering another curse to a football team 7,000 miles away. I want to be that farmer.

I must say that, notwithstanding another gut punch Bills loss-that-should-have-been-a-victory, the Bills do find interesting ways to lose. Such as forcing the Golden Boy, Tony Romo, to turn the ball over six times, yet allowing Dallas to recover an onside kick, then boot a winning 50+ yard field goal as time expires.

God, if he or she does exist, hates us.

TILT

Got back from Vegas at 12:45 am Monday morning with nothing but lint in my pockets. I got busted six ways from Sunday in Sin City and now have a pleasant week of eating my shoes for dinner.

Friday YouTube Nugget (one day early)

VEGA$ EDITION, PT II, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO

It seems as if I never left...I am headed back to Sin City, this time for my aunt's 60th birthday. My whole family (8 people) will be there - a reunion, of sorts. I can't wait to hear how my cousin's job with US immigration law in Seattle is going, how my other cousin is faring with his computer programming consulting in St. Louis...and how many cans of tuna my brother has consumed this week in Las Vegas.

In any case, we will be attending the much-hyped Cirque du Soleil (or, "Sun Circus"....fact) show featuring the music of the Beatles as background to a bunch of contortionists acting all spastic in the foreground. Some call it "interpretive, circus-based artistic and athletic stage performance"...I call it a bunch of fruit pies running around in spandex, seeing how much abuse they can apply to their joints and spines before breaking in half.

Whoa...I think I was channelling Bill O'Reilly for a second. Anyhoo, here's a clip of my favorite band of all time performing "Your Mother Should Know"

Friday YouTube Nugget

In honor of the end of baseball's regular season, I'm posting an old favorite - a postgame tirade from Cubs manager Lee Elia in 1983. Some choice thoughts from Mr. Elia on the state of baseball in the Windy City at that time, particularly the following bon mot:

"What the fuck am I supposed to do, go out there and let my fuckin' players get destroyed every day and be quiet about it? For the fuckin' nickel-dime people who turn up? The motherfuckers don't even work. That's why they're out at the fuckin' game. They oughta go out and get a fuckin' job and find out what it's like to go out and earn a fuckin' living. Eighty-five percent of the fuckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here..."

My new favorite artist

Ladies and gentleman....I present the gentle, yet rocking artist from the Great White North.....Feist

The genius that was SCTV

I had an opportunity to surf the Web at work (an uncommon occurrence, I assure you) and was in the mood to listen to a little 80's cheese pop. To be precise, any song I remember from 1980-1982 that's marked by one or more trademarks of this hallowed genre:

- drowning in synthesizers
- weird voice effects

- banal lyrics that have as much weight and meaning as a half-eaten Twinkie

- video shot on Betamax tape with a production budget of about $9.95

So I found what I was looking for in the insipid Chilliwack hit from 1981 - "My Girl (Gone, Gone, Gone):

But, lo and behold, there was another YouTube listing for "My Girl"....this one done by the comic geniuses at SCTV...I didn't even remember this episode, but this had me in stitches:

You don't have to remember the song or the times to enjoy this. Pure gold.

I Want A New Drug

One that won't go away
One that won't keep me up all night
One that won't make me sleep all day

Not to go all Huey Lewis and the News on you, but I really need a new form of medication. The DayQuil/NyQuil cocktail I've been imbibing the last two days is just not doing it for me. And that cockamamie saline nasal spray that's supposed to clear out your sinuses and eliminate a stuffy, runny nose? Hello nosebleeds!

So now, I'm a coughing, rheumy-eyed, sneezing, wheezing, nose-bleeding shell of a man who just managed to drag his carcass to work today. O, death, where is thy sting?

Sick

Friday YouTube Nugget

I HEART BOOBS

Win This Division or We'll Shoot This Dog

Hmmm....what's that saying about history and repeating?

Late September, 1978: the Boston Red Sox blow a 14.5 game lead over the Yankees and proceed to lose a one game playoff for the division on October 2nd.

Late September, 2007: the Boston Red Sox are about to blow another double digit lead over the Yankees and it might not even get to a one game playoff as long as the Sox keep putting in Eric "Gasoline Fire" Gagne. He's more flammable than Richard Pryor with a fifth of cognac and a freebase pipe.

Oh, this is going to be a very interesting week, indeed. If the Sox revert to their natural ways and choke like Tennessee Williams on an aspirin bottle cap, then this is going to be the last comforting image for Sox fans for a long, long time:

37 years too soon

Today marks 37 years since Jimi Hendrix walked among us. Words seem futile, so here's one of my favorite Hendrix clips, from the excellent 1973 documentary, Jimi Hendrix.

Friday YouTube Nugget

VEGA$ EDITION, Y'ALL!!!

In honor of my trip to Sin City in about 8 hours, I've unearthed a very special clip of the King himself, Elvis Presley. This is, I think, indicative of the charisma and stage presence that endeared Elvis to audiences worldwide:

OK seriously...here's the Dead Kennedys doing "Viva Las Vegas"

Today is the greatest....

day I've ever known...

This morning, I looked on my Yahoo page and there in the Sports sections were the two headlines to remind me that there is justice and righteousness in this world:

Spy flap raises questions about Patriots
Everett's mom hopeful of son's recovery

Like Louie said, what a wonderful world.....

A Look Back At September 11th (or The Week Football Stopped®)

This is how I'd like to remember lower Manhattan

Six years ago, I was living and working in San Francisco. I was a little over a year into my job at Blue Shield of California after graduating business school and was (mostly) enjoying my 30th year in 2001. The evening of Monday, September 10th was spent watching Ed McCaffrey break his leg and end his career on Monday Night Football. I had some early morning meetings to get to the next day and I turned in pretty early.

I was awakened at 6:30 am Tuesday morning September 11th to the phone ringing. In my daze and fog, I stumbled over to the phone and noticed it was my mom calling from Buffalo. She had a habit of conveniently forgetting about the 3-hour time difference between the Bay Area and Buffalo and loved to call me in the morning to make sure I was up. I ignored the ringing phone and hopped in the shower, figuring I'd call her back on my way into work.

The phone kept ringing as I went through my morning routine. Finally, on the sixth call while I was shaving, I realized that something was wrong...she would never call over and over like this. I wiped my face and picked up the phone and heard the fateful words:

"Turn on the TV. The World Trade Center has been attacked"

I switched on the TV, sat on the couch and watched with my jaw on the floor at the image of both towers of the World Trade Center smouldering while apocalyptic messages filled the crawl at the bottom of the screen ("PENTAGON ATTACKED", "U.S. CAPITOL BUILDING BOMBED"). I've only been watching for a minute or so when the South Tower of the WTC, a building that's been an iconic part of the NYC skyline for 28 years, collapsed. To call it surreal and unthinkable doesn't even come close to the sensation I (and most people watching it on TV) felt. The only thing I can compare it to is if someone told you the sun would extinguish tomorrow morning and you saw it live on TV.

I spent most of September 11th, 2001 on my couch, half-riveted to the news unfolding as the day progressed and half on the phone, calling everyone I knew who lived or worked in mid & lower Manhattan. My best friend worked near the WTC site and he was the only one I couldn't reach...I eventually caught up with him in the late afternoon. He had been one of the thousands who walked acrosss the Brooklyn Bridge to Brooklyn and was in a bar chatting up a girl.

I eventually got off my couch and ventured outside. Everyone looked like they were in the same state of shock as me. In short order, I gave blood, walked by my office (which had been closed in the morning as a precaution), had a sandwich and called my brother, with whom I hadn't spoken in 2 years. It's pretty pathetic that it took a national tragedy of this magnitude to get us talking again, but there you go.

It's popular in some circles to use as a mantra, "9/11 changed everything". I don't particularly subscribe to that bumper-sticker thinking, but there is little doubt that our society, our culture, our way of life have been forever changed. The confidence we used to exude, the blind faith we enjoyed in our lives, the utter joy of being an American is dented. What seemed to be important arguments now pale in consideration of the 3,000 innocent lives still buried under tons of rubble at Ground Zero.

The last six years have been, for me, a blur of authoritarian aggression, from the fictitious war in Iraq to the the suspension of Constitutional protections here. "9/11" has been used as justification for every hare-brained operation the administration has mounted, but we've quickly forgotten what we felt in the immediate aftermath. Writing this post takes me back to the days after September 11th, 2001. The world rallied to our side and we enjoyed an outpouring of support and love that we hadn't felt since the end of World War II. While we wondered if we'd ever be able to laugh and sing again, people around to world stood with us and, by virtue of the weight of their experiences, told us it would be alright. The Israeli who's witnessed six bus explosions in the past decade. The Irish kid whose father was killed by English soldiers during the Troubles. A Spanish couple who lost their daughter to a Basque terroist attack in Barcelona a decade ago. A Filipino woman whose husband was abducted and likely killed by the Abu Sayyaf terrorists near Manilla. And on and on and on...

We as Americans do not hold a patent on misery and suffering, even though we sometimes act like we do. We're just recent entrants. Six years? We're mere infants in the mass-wave-of-death anniversaries compared to our brethren in the U.K and France.

I'll spend this day with a thought for the innocent lives lost on 9/11/01. But my mourning is reserved for the lives lost since in the service of a criminal administration. And most of all, I miss seeing those two skyscrapers dominate the New York City skyline.

Kevin Everett

That would be Bills backup Tight End Kevin Everett, who suffered a spinal cord injury while making a tackle on the opening kickoff of the second half of yesterday's Bills-Broncos game.

It's tempting to say this is some sort of microcosm of the misery and pain of being a Bills fan, but that seems like cheap and ugly point to make while this 25-year old man lies on a respirator at Buffalo General after enduring intensive surgery on his spine last night.

Losing a football game is one thing....witnessing this man collapse on the ground like a sack of wet potatoes at the Ralph yesterday is another.

Friday YouTube Nugget

"And now, today's sermon is from our beloved Reverend Cleophus James..."

Have you seen the light?

UPDATE: Senator Widestance Goes To The Mattresses

Oh, it's on now, bitches!

In what must be an intentional act to deliver the White House and significant majorities in both houses of Congress to the Democrats next year, Senator Craig (he of the toe-tapping, foot-brushing rituals in the men's room in the Minneapolis airport - see post below) is rethinking his resignation. Because, I shit you not, this clown thinks he can withdraw his guilty plea:

"It's not such a foregone conclusion anymore, that the only thing he could do was resign," Sidney Smith, Craig's spokesman in Idaho's capital, told The Associated Press. We're still preparing as if Senator Craig will resign Sept. 30, but the outcome of the legal case in Minnesota and the ethics investigation will have an impact on whether we're able to stay in the fight — and stay in the Senate," Smith said."

Please, please, please Senator....for the love of all that is pure and righteous, please stay in office and fight! Please grab the headlines away from the dog-and-pony show that will be General Petraeus' report to Congress on the surge (gee...let me guess how that'll go). Please disobey the Senate GOP leadership. I love the smell of conservative fratricide in the afternoon.

Fantasy Football Team #3 - My Vick In A Box

QB #1: Marc Bulger
QB #2: Tony Romo
RB #1: Edgerrin James
RB #2: Deuce McAllister
RB #3: LaMont Jordan
WR #1: Chad Johnson
WR #2: Santana Moss
WR #3: Mushin Muhammed
WR #4: Peerless Price
TE: Heath Miller
K: Neil Rackers
DEF #1: Philadelphia
DEF #2: Green Bay
D: DeMeco Ryans
DB: Kerry Rhodes
DL: Zach Thomas

Fantasy Football Team #2 - Norwood's Curse

QB #1: Donovan McNabb
QB #2: Tony Romo
RB #1: Joseph Addai
RB #2: Thomas Jones
RB #3: Deuce McAllister
WR #1: Anquan Boldin
WR #2: Jerrico Cotchery
WR #3: Terry Glenn
WR #4: Drew Bennett
TE: Heath Miller
K: Robbie Gould
DEF #1: Philadelphia
DEF #2: Minnesota
D: DeMeco Ryans
DB: Adrian Wilson
DL: Antonio Pierce

Friday YouTube Nugget

Chenquieh, jagshemash:

This week's nugget derives from my embarrassing devotion to finding new music through TV ads. I'm sure you've all seen that hip Dell Inspiron ad with a bunch of artsy types creating all sorts of interesting scenes with the aid of their laptops....anyhoo, the song in the ad is ultra-catchy and, when I looked it up, discovered it was the amazing Flaming Lips!

So, in the tradition of Nick Drake's "Pink Moon" (Volkswagen) and the Kinks' "Picture Book" (HP), I give you "W.A.N.D." by the Flaming Lips. Thanks, Madison Avenue.

Senator Wide Stance (R-My Own Private Idaho) or "How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love The Ass" By Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho)

"Oh! Hi....hi there. Didn't see you in there...actually I did. Tee-hee. You look pretty cute sitting there with your pants around your ankles. Would you like some company? I bet we could squeeze in there together and have some fun...here, let me put my bag down. Are you cut.....Oh my God Jiminy, yes! I can't wait to get that in my mouth...mmmmmmfffffffgkgkgk"

- purported transcript from men's room at Minneapolis-St. Paul aiport between Senator Larry Craig (R-Idaho) and an undercover officer.

If it's Tuesday, it must mean another "family values" Republican gasbag asshole has been exposed to the world as the ass-loving, men's room-cruising, rough trade-loving hypocritical tea queen that he is. This week's lucky recepient of the "Do As I Say, Not As I Suck" award is the honorable Sen. Larry Craig, Republican from Idaho:

"(CBS/AP) Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, who has voted against gay marriage and opposes extending special protections to gay and lesbian crime victims, finds his political future in doubt after pleading guilty to misdemeanor charges stemming from complaints of lewd conduct in a men's room.

...Minutes later, the officer saw Craig gazing into his stall through the crack between the stall door and the frame, fidgeted with his fingers and returned to gazing through the stall for about another two minutes. "

GAZING INTO THE STALL? FOR TWO MINUTES?!!!! Holy shit....this guy was aching for some man-meat!!! Let's return to the tale of ribaldry...

"After a man in the adjacent stall flushed the toilet and left, Craig entered it and put his roller bag against the front of the stall door, "which Sgt. Karsnia's experience has indicated is used to attempt to conceal sexual conduct by blocking the view from the front of the stall," said the complaint, which was dated June 25."

June 25?!! And we're only finding out about this now? Damn, this guy knows how to snuff a story...well, for a couple months, anyway.

"The complaint said Craig then tapped his right foot several times and moved it closer to Karsnia's stall and then moved it into the area of the officer's stall to where it touched Karsnia's foot. Karsnia recognized that "as a signal often used by persons communicating a desire to engage in sexual conduct," the complaint said. Craig then passed his left hand under the stall divider into Karsnia's stall with his palms up and guided it along the divider toward the front of the stall three times, the complaint said."

Translation: hey stud...I'm looking for a cock to suck and lucky me, here you are. Why don't you let me in so I can pleasure you in a 6'x3' space?

"The officer then showed his police identification under the divider and pointed towards the exit "at which time the defendant exclaimed `No!,' " the complaint said."

Whoops....er...I was reaching for a piece of toilet paper! Really! And my foot just happened to brush yours even though we're in different stalls and most men would rather drink straight from the urinal than come into physical contact with anybody else in there! Honest! I've got a wide stance! (eds note - these are all actual excuses offered by Senator Craig)

"Roll Call, a Capitol Hill newspaper which first reported the case, quoted the Aug. 8 police report as saying that Craig had handed the arresting officer a business card that identified him as a member of the Senate. "What do you think about that?" Craig is alleged to have said, according to the report."

Hahaha....you just have to love a guy caught in the most humilating and damaging moment in his professional career still trying to throw his weight around. I hope the cop laughed in his face.

Ah....there is just so much to love about this story. A career homophobe, a disgusting piece of bigot shit who voted against every single piece of legislation he saw that protected the rights of gay and lesbian Americans, a worthless troglodyte who pandered to each and every extremist, anti-gay lobby in the nation....is now exposed to be what he presumably reviled and hated. A deviant cruising in men's rooms for cock. Good luck getting the support from those churches and religious political action groups that lined your pockets for the last 30 years (although, come to think of it, they're all probably closet cases themselves).

My prediction for Sen. Craig's immediate career path: rehab, followed by a cameo on Project Runway.

Fantasy Football Team #1: The Ray Lewis Posse

In the league "Pacman's Entourage":

QB: Donovan McNabb
QB: Matt Hasselbeck
RB: Shaun Alexander
RB: Deuce McAllister
RB: Cedric Benson
RB: Chris Henry
WR: Anquan Boldin
WR: Jerrico Cotchery
WR: Mushin Muhammed
WR: Santonio Holmes
TE: L.J. Smith
K: Robbie Gould
K: Josh Scobee
DB: Chris Hope
DB: Jermaine Phillips
DL: DeMeco Ryans
DL: London Fletcher

Damn....not a single Bill on the roster.

Bedtime for Gonzo

My prayers have been answered....Hallelujah!
(until the President makes his recess appointment of some other incompetent criminal hack as our next AG)



from this morning's New York Times story on the resignation:

"The official who disclosed the resignation today said that the decision was Mr. Gonzales’s and that the president accepted it grudgingly. At the same time, the official acknowledged that the turmoil over Mr. Gonzales had made his continuing as attorney general difficult.

The unfair treatment that he’s been on the receiving end of has been a distraction for the department,” the official said." (emphasis mine)

I'd say the biggest distraction for the Justice Department has been that their top-ranking official has been taking a shit on the Constitution for the past two and a half years. Oh well, with the departures of Rove and Gonzo, the stench of corruption and malfeasance at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave is slowly starting to dissipate

Friday YouTube Nugget

Greetings and salutations:

For this week's Nugget, I thought I'd pay tribute to a soul icon as we are coming up on the 40th anniversary of his death. Otis Redding was taken from this world far too soon and he had so much more to give. This clip gives you a small indication of how powerful an entertainer he was....this is taken from his legendary appearance at the Monterey Pop Festival in 1967. Recorded six months before his death in a plane crash in a Wisconsin lake, this shows Otis wowing the "love" crowd with his version of Sam Cooke's "Shake". Note that his backing band is the equally legendary Booker T. & The MGs.

Otis Redding would be turning 66 on Sept. 9.

My (REVISED) Fantasy Football Draft Rankings

*one of my leagues is an auto-draft and the switch is being flipped today, so I took advantage of the weekend to do a little tweaking. You will notice that I've dropped TEs to the bottom of my rank order. My feeling is, if you don't get either Antonio Gates or Tony Gonzalez, then TE is about as worthless a fantasy position as you can find. Hell, there were 23 kickers who had over 100 fantasy points last season, compared to 7 TEs.

My other two leagues have their live draft this Sunday night (wonderful idea, BTW, to hold 4 hours of drafting over the Labor Day weekend. Christ!)

Anyway, here's what I'm going with


1. LaDainian Tomlinson
2. Steven Jackson
3. Shaun Alexander
4. Joseph Addai
5. Willie Parker
6. Frank Gore
7. Rudi Johnson
8. Larry Johnson
9. Brian Westbrook
10. Laurence Maroney
11. Travis Henry
12. Reggie Bush
13. Deuce McAllister
14. Thomas Jones
15. Cedric Benson
16. Ronnie Brown
17. Edgerrin James
18. Willis McGahee
19. Brandon Jacobs
20. Clinton Portis
21. Peyton Manning
22. Donovan McNabb
23. Drew Brees
24. Tom Brady
25. Carson Palmer
26. Marc Bulger
27. Tony Romo
28. Philip Rivers
29. Matt Hasselbeck
30. Jay Cutler
31. Vince Young
32. J.P. Losman
33. Maurice Jones-Drew
34. Jamal Lewis
35. Marshawn Lynch
36. Ahman Green
37. Carnell Williams
38. Marion Barber III
39. DeAngelo Williams
40. Julius Jones
41. Tatum Bell
42. Chester Taylor
43. Matt Leinart
44. Eli Manning
45. Jake Delhomme
46. Jeff Garcia
47. Chad Pennington
48. Marvin Harrison
49. Chad Johnson
50. Terrell Owens
51. Torry Holt
52. Reggie Wayne
53. Anquan Boldin
54. Marques Colston
55. Donald Driver
56. Lee Evans
57. Roy Williams
58. Steve Smith
59. Javon Walker
60. T.J. Houshmandzadeh
61. Randy Moss
62. Hines Ward
63. Larry Fitzgerald
64. Calvin Johnson
65. Santana Moss
66. Jerricho Cotchery
67. Muhsin Muhammad
68. Santonio Holmes
69. Plaxico Burress
70. Deion Branch
71. Andre Johnson
72. Reggie Brown
73. Joey Galloway
74. Bernard Berrian
75. Terry Glenn
76. Donte' Stallworth
77. Laveranues Coles
78. Darrell Jackson
79. Antonio Gates
80. Robbie Gould
81. Nate Kaeding
82. Jeff Wilkins
83. Josh Scobee
84. Jason Hanson
85. Matt Stover
86. Neil Rackers
87. Joe Nedney
88. Shayne Graham
89. Josh Brown
90. Adam Vinatieri
91. Adrian Wilson
92. Chris Hope
93. Jermaine Phillips
94. Ronde Barber
95. Kerry Rhodes
96. Sean Taylor
97. Champ Bailey
98. Brian Dawkins
99. Sean Jones
100. Antoine Winfield
101. DeMeco Ryans
102. London Fletcher
103. Zach Thomas
104. Keith Bulluck
105. Lance Briggs
106. Donnie Edwards
107. Antonio Pierce
108. Cato June
109. Jason Taylor
110. Shawne Merriman
111. Jerious Norwood
112. Adrian Peterson
113. Fred Taylor
114. Ladell Betts
115. Brandon Jackson
116. LaMont Jordan
117. DeShaun Foster
118. LenDale White
119. Kevin Jones
120. Vernand Morency
121. Warrick Dunn
122. Chris Henry
123. Dominic Rhodes
124. Reuben Droughns
125. Leon Washington
126. Michael Turner
127. Ron Dayne
128. Mike Bell
129. Anthony Thomas
130. Jon Kitna
131. Brett Favre
132. Ben Roethlisberger
133. Rex Grossman
134. Alex Smith
135. Matt Schaub
136. Steve McNair
137. Trent Green
138. Jason Campbell
139. Byron Leftwich
140. Kurt Warner
141. Daunte Culpepper
142. Joey Harrington
143. Damon Huard
144. Braylon Edwards
145. Vincent Jackson
146. Mark Clayton
147. Chris Chambers
148. Kevin Curtis
149. Devery Henderson
150. Joe Horn
151. Jerry Porter
152. Derrick Mason
153. Eddie Kennison
154. Drew Bennett
155. Chris Henry
156. Marty Booker
157. Wes Welker
158. Mike Furrey
159. Amani Toomer
160. Michael Jenkins
161. Michael Clayton
162. Eric Parker
163. Peerless Price
164. Todd Heap
165. Tony Gonzalez
166. Chris Cooley
167. Jeremy Shockey
168. Kellen Winslow
169. Vernon Davis
170. Alge Crumpler

excluded from my draft rankings:
Michael Vick - has an pressing engagement with the Georgia Department of Corrections in 2007-2008
Jake Plummer - decided to leave football rather than play for Tampa Bay. He was good friends with the late Pat Tillman and I hope he devotes some of his time to helping the Tillman family in their quest for the truth about how their son died.
Isaac Bruce - a near Hall of Fame career, but he is way past his prime
Priest Holmes - PUP (Physically Unable to Perform).
Curtis Martin - retired

If you're not completely disgusted, you're not paying attention

The headline on DailyKos says it all - "Bush to America's Children: Drop Dead"

from today's NYT:

"The Bush administration, continuing its fight to stop states from expanding the popular Children’s Health Insurance Program, has adopted new standards that would make it much more difficult for New York, California and others to extend coverage to children in middle-income families....In interviews, they (Administration officials) said the changes were aimed at returning the Children’s Health Insurance Program to its original focus on low-income children and to make sure the program did not become a substitute for private health coverage. "

(let me repeat that to ensure we're clear about the Administration's priorities)

make sure the program did not become a substitute for private health coverage

5 to 6 million children will go to sleep tonight without any health insurance. Countless millions more go without adequate insurance. The Bush Administration could care less as long as Big Insurance gets paid.

Somewhere, the ghost of Herbert Hoover laughs, knowing that finally there's a Chief Executive more painfully obvious in his graft.

From the Department of What The Fuck?!!!

General David Petraeus' testimony to Congress on the "progress" of the surge in Iraq will occur on September 11, 2007, the sixth anniversary of the terrorist attacks.

Along the same lines....this report, which has been hyped by President Gameboy and his enablers in Congress as being an honest assessment of the war's progress from Gen. Petraeus, will, in fact, be written by the White House. The key passage:

"An aide to Senate Armed Services Committee Chairman Carl M. Levin (D-Mich.) said that "we are in talks with the administration and Senator Levin wants an open hearing" with Petraeus. Those positions only hardened yesterday with reports that the document would not be written by the Army general but instead would come from the White House, with input from Petraeus, Crocker and other administration officials."

Why does anybody believe a single goddamn word coming from the White House? If they were one-tenth as talented at governing as they are in Propaganda 101, we'd be the greatest fucking empire since the Brits.

Negligent, Bad, Bad Humanist Trying To Atone for Missed Friday YouTube Nuggets

Yeah....I know. I've been beyond derelict in keeping up with my Friday tradition. I think I'm up to two straight weeks blowing this off. Fine....here's an avalanche of YouTube goodies to quiet the rabble:

1) Traffic - John Barleycorn (live at Santa Monica, 1972)

Steve Winwood plays. You listen








2) The Rentals - Friends of P (1995)

Good god....is this song really 12 years old? Gaaak...I feel liver spots sprouting as we speak.

3) Isaac Hayes - Walk On By (1969)

Black Moses himself, before Shaft, an Oscar, Truck Turner, bankruptcy, "The Duke" in Escape From New York and of course "South Park". Hayes does to Bacharach here what Sherman did to Atlanta - he burns the mutha down. Supreme cover version of Dionne Warwick's hit.

...and the collars at Fenway get just wee bit tighter

It's been almost half a decade, but I'm actually interested again in a pennant race - specifically, the AL East. The Yankees (whom I detest) have gone 27-11 since the All-Star break to climb within 4 games of the division leading Red Sox (whom I also detest, just not as much as NY). Notwithstanding historic Yankee comebacks/devastating Red Sox chokes, I don't think the Yankees have it in them to complete the comeback....but August and September just got a hell of a lot more interesting.

An Historic Night

Congratulations to Barry Lamar Bonds who now stands atop Major League Baseball's all-time Home Run List. I'm a Giants fan and, yes, a Bonds fan. I acknowledge he may have taken steroids, but so did the majority of pitchers he faced. Until the man fails a drug test, I'm not condemning him. The hysterical sportswriters braying over the last year that Bonds signals the very end of Western civilization are the same lickspittle horde that slobbered over Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa in 1998....hypocrites, one and all.

And the home page of Sports Illustrated's coverage of this is a disgrace.

Friday YouTube Nugget

This week's selection: Greetings from 1990 Madchester! Happy Mondays, man! You're twisting my melon, man!

Step On