"Oh! Hi....hi there. Didn't see you in there...actually I did. Tee-hee. You look pretty cute sitting there with your pants around your ankles. Would you like some company? I bet we could squeeze in there together and have some fun...here, let me put my bag down. Are you cut.....Oh my God Jiminy, yes! I can't wait to get that in my mouth...mmmmmmfffffffgkgkgk"
- purported transcript from men's room at Minneapolis-St. Paul aiport between Senator Larry Craig (R-Idaho) and an undercover officer.
If it's Tuesday, it must mean another "family values" Republican gasbag asshole has been exposed to the world as the ass-loving, men's room-cruising, rough trade-loving hypocritical tea queen that he is. This week's lucky recepient of the "Do As I Say, Not As I Suck" award is the honorable
Sen. Larry Craig, Republican from Idaho:
"(CBS/AP) Idaho Sen. Larry Craig, who has voted against gay marriage and opposes extending special protections to gay and lesbian crime victims, finds his political future in doubt after pleading guilty to misdemeanor charges stemming from complaints of lewd conduct in a men's room.
...Minutes later, the officer saw Craig gazing into his stall through the crack between the stall door and the frame, fidgeted with his fingers and returned to gazing through the stall for about another two minutes. "
GAZING INTO THE STALL? FOR TWO MINUTES?!!!! Holy shit....this guy was aching for some man-meat!!! Let's return to the tale of ribaldry...
"After a man in the adjacent stall flushed the toilet and left, Craig entered it and put his roller bag against the front of the stall door, "which Sgt. Karsnia's experience has indicated is used to attempt to conceal sexual conduct by blocking the view from the front of the stall," said the complaint, which was dated June 25."
June 25?!! And we're only finding out about this now? Damn, this guy knows how to snuff a story...well, for a couple months, anyway.
"The complaint said Craig then tapped his right foot several times and moved it closer to Karsnia's stall and then moved it into the area of the officer's stall to where it touched Karsnia's foot. Karsnia recognized that "as a signal often used by persons communicating a desire to engage in sexual conduct," the complaint said. Craig then passed his left hand under the stall divider into Karsnia's stall with his palms up and guided it along the divider toward the front of the stall three times, the complaint said."
Translation: hey stud...I'm looking for a cock to suck and lucky me, here you are. Why don't you let me in so I can pleasure you in a 6'x3' space?
"The officer then showed his police identification under the divider and pointed towards the exit "at which time the defendant exclaimed `No!,' " the complaint said."
Whoops....er...I was reaching for a piece of toilet paper! Really! And my foot just happened to brush yours even though we're in different stalls and most men would rather drink straight from the urinal than come into physical contact with anybody else in there! Honest! I've got a wide stance! (eds note - these are all actual excuses offered by Senator Craig)
"Roll Call, a Capitol Hill newspaper which first reported the case, quoted the Aug. 8 police report as saying that Craig had handed the arresting officer a business card that identified him as a member of the Senate. "What do you think about that?" Craig is alleged to have said, according to the report."
Hahaha....you just have to love a guy caught in the most humilating and damaging moment in his professional career still trying to throw his weight around. I hope the cop laughed in his face.
Ah....there is just so much to love about this story. A career homophobe, a disgusting piece of bigot shit who voted against every single piece of legislation he saw that protected the rights of gay and lesbian Americans, a worthless troglodyte who pandered to each and every extremist, anti-gay lobby in the nation....is now exposed to be what he presumably reviled and hated. A deviant cruising in men's rooms for cock. Good luck getting the support from those churches and religious political action groups that lined your pockets for the last 30 years (although, come to think of it, they're all probably closet cases themselves).
My prediction for Sen. Craig's immediate career path: rehab, followed by a cameo on Project Runway.
"Durrrrrrrrrrrrrrr..."
"Hi - I'm extremely uncomfortable around colored folk"
